Lets Talk About Sex….Again
I saw an article in the The Daily Telegraph which caught my eye. “Sex lives of Australian women”, which led to a book by the same name. It involved the findings of a major online survey regarding sex and women in Australia. Around 2000 women were surveyed, and the results are interesting. Firstly a woman apparently has an average of 13 different sexual partners in her life. Phew, glad I make that category. But really how true is it? We all know what they say, women half it, men double it. But thats our secret. Let me share with you a few other interesting findings.
ONE in four women view pornography regularly; does perving in the locker room during half time of a footy game on T.V count?
MOST women (61 per cent) masturbate at least once a month; mmmm, well have you seen the toys out there these day’s, why wouldn’t you.
ONE in five have starred in their own sex tape; uh uh, not going to happen. Any video that comes near my naked body will end up jammed somewhere painful. Who really wants to watch themselves having sex?? Other than celebrities of course.
MULTIPLE partners are a growing fad; not sure if this means at once, or one after the other. But gee are we turing into men!
MANY complain of boring sex lives and one in three rarely, if ever, experience orgasm; well they need to read my blog more for tips. Or get a new partner who knows what he’s doing.
ALMOST half (49 per cent) say they want sex most of the time when it is offered. I must say, I don’t often knock back sex, but I am in my 30’s which is apparently in my prime. And the humping like rabbits when in a fresh relationship doesn’t last forever, so I say make the most of it.
It also states that women want more emotional intimacy before sex, and need to understand their voice is there most important sexual organ. In otherwords tell him what you want. He won’t know if you don’t tell him! This basically leads to women faking orgasms regularly, (as seen in the above clip, which I love from “When Harry met Sally”). 1 in 10 women do fake it almost everytime, according to another survey reported in the Daily Mail. Which doesn’t say a lot for the male lovers of the world.
So what that tells me is, women out there need to take control, ask for what you want, watch plenty of porn, tape yourself having (drunk) sex, masturbate regularly and you’ll be happy in your relationship. Sounds so easy!
Posted in In the News, Sex and naughty stuff on April 8th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
The Number Game.
How many sexual partners have you had in your lifetime? This was the question I recently put to all my faithful and loyal readers and friends. At first I wondered if the question was a bit to personal, but considering all the responses I received, I believe not. In the news recently French First Lady and former supermodel Carla Bruni-Sarkozy caused upset by releasing a song called “my 30 lovers”, which was thought to refer to how many men she had slept with before she married the French President. She in fact says it was more like 15, but 30 actually sounded better in the song. Now, she is a 40 year old woman, divorced with a child. Is 15 a lot of sexual partners? I think not, but my tally has already exceeded this and I am in my early 30’s (still). Your thoughts on this really depends on your own total. This got me thinking, dangerous indeed, what is the average tally? How do my friends compare? So I surveyed my friends whose ages range from around 26 – 45, being very generous with the ratios so they felt more inclined to answer!
The catergories were:
A) 0 – 15
B) 15 – 40
C) 40 – 80
D) Too many to name
Catergory A was the most common answer from both men and women. Mainly from people in long term steady relationships in their 30’s. Myself and a few other females all single in their 30’s obviously out having fun fit into catergory B. An equal amount of both sexes land in Catergory C. Not surprisingly they are all either divorced, with kids, and in their 40’s. One particular girlfriend answered C “to the best of her knowledge”. So Carla you have nothing to worry about! Catergory D basically went to the football team! My friends ex tells us he and his mates have all slept with at least 100 women, roughly. Gee how surprising.
Of course this may not be a true indication as there is a general rule that women halve their total while men double it! I was recently asked by a partner how many men I had slept with. I told him that is a question you should never ask a woman. And then I lied and halved it! Society still seems to look down upon promiscuous women calling them all sorts of names, skanky, hoe, tart, scrubber all come to mind. Oh that brings back memories of high school name calling. Whilst I believe men are still called studs, and slapped on the back for scoring a big tally, but thats my opinon of course. I wasn’t that surprised by the totals and believe them to be true indications according to each persons history, lifestyle and age.
Funny, I should have put a catergory E, as I got a few answers that read, “not enough”. Mostly from the long term married men. As they say “the grass is always greener”. You so don’t want to be back out in the single world, it’s hard work!
Posted in In the News, Sex and naughty stuff on December 16th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 1 Comments
If Men are from Mars….
If men are from Mars then send them back! Apparently the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, by John Gray, “reveals new strategies for reducing tension in relationships and creating more love by first recognising in great detail how men and women are different.” Different? You think? I don’t need a book to explain that, they are in my book from another planet!
Don’t get me wrong this is a great book, a manual to help understand how men think although it needs to be a lot thicker. There’s my favorite section about men being like rubber bands, “when they pull away, they can stretch only so far before they come springing back.” Your supposed to wait this out and not force them back to the real world. I’m sure many of you can relate to this, I know I can. When your partner becomes distant, quiet and it seems like their pulling away. They prefer to spend time alone on the couch watching the footy instead of with you. But when you ask what’s wrong they say nothing. Or when they are full on at the start of a relationship only to back off all of a sudden and you wonder what you did wrong. Nothing is the answer. This is apparently quite normal for men.I have an ex boyfriend who is the perfect example of the man from Mars, he was like a rubber band all right, only he never sprung back! I knew this guy for a while we hooked up occasionally but it was always a casual thing. I liked him from the moment I met him, but it wasn’t until a few years later he actually asked me out. It’s almost when a booty call becomes a relationship, but that could be a whole other topic. I saw him out one night and he decided then and there that the time was right, he had apparently been thinking about me a lot. I wasn’t sure why now as opposed to say the last few years, but who was I to argue with my Chardonnay fueled brain that was jumping for joy. It started well, date nights, meeting each others friends, getting to know each other when not clouded by alcohol, although I must say in hindsight this was rare. Even my boss and friends commented it was pretty full on straight away. We even planned a holiday 2 months into the relationship. Then I went away overseas with work for 5 weeks and this is where it took a nosedive. The rubber band started stretching and stretching and I realised when I got home and he wasn’t there to greet me at the airport, it wasn’t coming back in a hurry.
Now the book says to wait it out but seriously I have a life to live, if a man can’t make up his mind whether he wants to be in a relationship or not then I can’t be waiting around. I mean it doesn’t have to be love at first sight, soul mates forever stuff, and sometimes you have to work together to get the relationship off the ground but you should at least want to spend as much time together as possible. If he wants to “be alone” or “just spend time by himself”, and the gap in the amount of time it takes for the rubber band to spring back gets longer, then quoting my other favorite book, “he’s just not that into you.”
It seems my boyfriend wasn’t a rubber band but a slingshot, catapulted away never to be seen again! Oh well, next!
Posted in Dating on May 14th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
It’s Time To Go
Is there a time limit on memorabilia from former relationships? Is it ok to have keepsakes from ex partners when you’re in a new relationship? A stranger in a bar put this question to me not long ago, he was surveying people asking for their opinion on a dilemma a mate was having. This intrigued and prompted me to conduct my own survey among friends with interesting responses.
Basically his mate and girlfriend of 3 months had recently moved in together, and whilst unpacking she came across a box of letters and cards from his previous girlfriend. She was upset by this, as he is still friends with his ex, and asked him to get rid of the box. Is this unreasonable? His mates thought so and thought the girlfriend should go! A bit harsh I think, but it got me thinking what I would do.
My first thought was if he split from the ex and has moved in with the new girlfriend why is he still friends with his ex? As far as I’m concerned you can’t stay friends with an ex, not for long anyway. There is often still emotional baggage and feelings involved, and it’s just too easy to go back to something because it’s familiar but that can be a topic for another day! Secondly it really boils down to having trust in the relationship. Having only been together for 3 months you’re still in the honeymoon stage, and getting to know each other. Your learning about each others past and the fact that he has kept these personal things either means he’s sentimental or isn’t over the ex yet. I think she should give it more time and let him do it if and when he’s ready. I don’t see a problem with keepsakes but I’m not sure if I’d be comfortable with a whole box of love letters and mushy cards.
The response form my male friends was not what I expected. One said he would get rid of the box without hesitation, believing that if he cared for the new girlfriend then he shouldn’t need to keep the box. He also says he wouldn’t remain friends with the ex. Another said he “still has a whole stack of letters from my ex’s over the years and while I would consider throwing them out for the ‘right girl’; the reason I keep them is a lot less to do with them than it is to do to with me. I like to look back at who I was then and how I interacted with others over the years and compare that to who I am now”.A common response was that the new girlfriend had a lack of confidence in herself and had doubts about the boyfriend’s commitment to the relationship. Which can, as pointed out go both ways, it’s a bit of an ego thing for a man too. As my girlfriend said, when the relationship gets to the “same emotional level”, as the previous one then he will get rid of the letters because he now has the love and feeling he gets from reading the letters with his new partner.
The older more mature ladies both said they still have stuff from previous husbands and ex boyfriends. One even has letters from 40 years ago which she says are “memories both good and bad”. The other thinks he may still have feelings for the ex by keeping the box, but there has to be an “element of trust in a relationship to make it work”.
Really is it a serious relationship after only 3 months? It’s easy to think you’re in love so quickly; this is just the first test to see if it will be a lasting relationship. I guess until I’m in her shoes I’m not sure what I would do. If it happens you’ll be the first to know!
Posted in Love and Relationships on April 8th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 1 Comments
