Online Interview
I was recently interviewed by former Mix 106 FM radio executive producer Brenden Wood for his website, “Is it possible to make money online?”. Follow the link below to listen to the discussion about how my blog came about, where I get my content, and answers to many questions you may have yourself. And a picture of me, so now I’m not so anonymous!
Posted in Media on February 17th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 2 Comments
Things You Can Do Now That Your Single.
I recently bought a book “Things to do now that you’re single…again”; full of inspiring quotes, ideas for new activities to do, places to go, ways to spoil yourself. As I looked through, it made me think about what I had done since I’d been single, the last 4 years. What effort had I put in to meeting new people? Especially men, had I challenged myself, or done anything which takes me out of my comfort zone, the one you tend to get in when your single. So I decided to share with you my challenges, triumphs and really lame attempts at trying new things. Well some of them were good while they lasted.
- One of the first things I did in order to meet men was take golf lessons; I figure this is a male dominated sport, so a great way to meet men. My class was made up of retired married women, lovely ladies but obviously they’re there for different reasons. And then I discovered that most men play golf to get away from their partners and wife’s. I also discovered I’m really not very good at golf.
- Two girlfriends and I took a single girl’s holiday to a tropical Island in the north of Australia. We chose what we thought was a singles island only to learn on arrival that it had changed hands and now catered for families. Ok so it was relaxing and we took a romantic sunset cruise just the 3 of us and 6 other couples looking into each other’s eyes all night. Romance! Needless to say we drank far too many champers and had to be carried off the boat. At least we got to see a pod of whales. We also got lost when we decided to circumnavigate the island, and unfortunately there were no big strong male rescuers. We just had to walk for hours in the hot sun, trekking over mountains till we found our way home. Believe me I’m not exaggerating! I hate bushwalking there is nothing serene about it.
- I also took dance lessons twice. The first time the class was full of all women, so it was fun but not great for meeting guys. So I decided to try rock and roll, as it was partner dancing. A male friend of mine wanted to do it too, so we went together. Basically the class was again all couples and everyone thought we were a couple anyway. There goes that idea. Next I’m trying Salsa, alone.I joined a ladies gym, which I attend 3 times a week. Why a ladies gym? I really don’t like the idea of going to gym classes to meet men looking sweaty and disheveled, with every part of my body flopping around for all to see. This wasn’t about meeting men obviously but doing something for myself. It makes me feel better, look better (sometimes), and often takes you away from day to day life even if only for 30 minutes.
- I started a new job, leaving behind a great job but one I felt I’d grown out of. I stayed in the same industry but took a more challenging and rewarding job. I also got a pay rise, which is even better!
- I’ve written a few times about Internet dating, I have tried this twice. It can be very daunting and stressful at times. Especially when your talking to a few guys at once and you get them mixed up. And blind dates, well they never get easier unless you have a bottle or two of wine before you go. But I persevere because one day I might just meet the right one. And it can be amusing at times; did I tell you the one about the guy whose scalp was peeling? Maybe some other time.
- And of course I started my own blog. I had stories to tell, I wanted to share my experiences with others so all the single people knew they weren’t alone. And that it’s not all bad being single. As I wrote this I discovered I had tried new things. Met many new people and enjoyed myself doing so. And I realise I have more to do so I better get cracking.
As Eva Gizowska (author of above book) said, “You don’t know how long you will be single, so make the most of it while you can! This is your chance to grab every opportunity that comes your way and get the life you want”. Whether it involves traveling, getting a new job, or taking golf lessons! There is no one to stop you from pursuing your dreams, so go out and do it, before you fall in love again.
Posted in Dating, Life on February 4th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Do Blonde’s Have More Fun?
Lets start with moi. Dark hair closer to black than brunette, although after not seeing my real hair colour for over 10 years I’m not really sure what it is. As I’ve said before I’m an average size 14 with a few extra kegs from Christmas, decent sized C cup bust with good cleavage or so I’ve been told, (by females too), seriously! I can go quite olive and have blue eyes. Sounds like my online dating profile! Then on the other hand we have one of my closest girlfriends, my party buddy who is also single and gorgeous. Most friends would say we have similar attributes just on opposite ends of the scale. She is similar in height, about a size 12, with DD bust, blue eyes and fair skin. And lastly but most importantly she is Blonde.
Now don’t get me wrong I have nothing against blondes I spent the first 20 or so years of my life as a blonde (my idol being Marilyn Monroe), natural then straight from a bottle. But what I do believe is that a lot of men, (in my opinion of course) are initially attracted to the whole blonde haired blue eyed stereotype. Men are visual creatures after all, this is a proven fact just read Cleo magazine. We have been on the singles scene together for a number of years and I have watched, usually from the sidelines, men continually approaching her when we are out together. Not that we are in competition, thank goodness we have complete opposite taste in men! But I have pointed this out to her and told her I think it’s cause she’s blonde that initially attracts men to her. The boobs help too!!
So we decided to do a little experiment. We both filled out a profile for an online dating service. Fairly similar profiles with a recent photo. They went online at the same time, and I bet her that she would have more contact overnight than me. Of course I was right she had 24 contacts from men of various ages and ethnicities. Me? Well I at least thought I’d have a couple, but no. I had none, nada, zilch. I’m not saying it’s because she had blonde hair, but I wonder if I wore a blonde wig if it would change the response. I may have to give that a go! I have since received contact from numerous men, my first date stood me up. But thats a story for another time. It still partly proved my point.
I realise I shouldn’t judge all men as being superficial, fickle and only interested in looks. So I surveyed my faithful group of male friends aged from 21 to 43. Firstly do they prefer Blondes or Brunettes, and secondly, does hair colour influence who they ask out. I must say I was put in my place and also happily surprised. The majority of them said hair colour didn’t matter, one saying, “initial attraction is not only the body but, face and attitude, if they look stuck up and unapproachable then I’ll keep looking for the girl smiling and having fun”. Great well thats me! A couple liked the Blondes but their wifes are blonde so they are probably playing it safe. I love that one guy said that there are two ways to look at it, if just ogling women then, “Blonde or Brunette? No preference. There are so many other more important things when purely ogling women that make them attractive”. Funny but so true. And if looking for a relationship then, “there has to be a spark of chemistry there between us or I’m not interested. Looks are number 30 in a list of what my soul mate must have”. And he fell in love with a girl online without even seeing a picture of her, and they are now happily married.
So I’m going to put my faith in my male friends and believe that I’m not disadvantaged by having dark hair when it comes to attracting men. My bubbly personality and brilliant smile should be enough! Oh and lets not forget my sense of humour and great cleavage. Gee what am I worried about I’m pretty much the perfect package, if they tell me next that big butts are in then I’m going to be surrounded by a bevy of men. LOL.
Posted in Dating on January 14th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 2 Comments
Cleo’s Next Top Blogger
Sex and the 30’s made it into the top 8 finalists for Cleo magazines
Next Top Blogger competition.
Posted in Media on November 20th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Love is Blind
Definition from Dictionary.com
Blind date:noun
| 1. | A social appointment or date arranged, usually by a third person, between two people who have not met. |
| 2. | Either of the participants in such an arrangement. |
Maybe it’s because people feel sorry for me, or they’re just attempting to improve what they think is a boring, lonely single life. You would think being single is a disease, as I’ve said and you would have already read, I have a fun single life but yes dating and searching for Mr. Right is a priority. I do appreciate my friends and family efforts at matchmaking. Although there have been no successful matches so far.
I guess my first foray into blind dating was through the Internet. Even though you may email and correspond before you meet, you are still meeting someone you don’t really know which is very daunting. I remember one particular date I turned up early to the meeting place; a local drinking hole, in other words a pub, and waited for my potential new husband to arrive. Having only seen one photo I wasn’t really sure I’d recognise him, as it turns out I didn’t. A guy has approached me after seeing me waiting for a while, I’ve assumed it’s my date so have introduced myself and asked if he was (for confidentiality purposes lets call him Paul). Not only was he not Paul but he was the bouncer that worked at the pub. He asked me who I was waiting for and stupid me told him I had a blind date, he then proceeded to lecture me on the dangers of meeting someone you don’t know and he hoped my family knew where I was. When Paul eventually turned up I could see Mr. Concerned bouncer checking him out, and throughout the night he kept wandering past to make sure I was ok. Very sweet, if he were 10 years younger I probably would have asked him if he were single. Ok, so I embarrassed myself and the date went downhill from there. After that disaster, in future I was to wait for any dates to approach me first.
This will definitely make me sound desperate; or maybe my parents desperate to see me settled down, but even they have attempted to set me up. My Dad worked with a bloke, we’ll call him Roger, and actually, I think that was his name. Anyway he was a labourer, separated from his wife and from the sounds of it happily single. But he must have felt sorry for me considering my Dad was trying to set me up and he agreed to a date. It’s not like he had a choice what was he going to say no, and upset my Dad. So we met on a Sunday at the aforementioned pub (after the last effort you think I would have stayed away). He was an hour late and extremely hung-over. He was a nice enough guy but I got the hint straight away he was only there to do my Dad a favour and not remotely interested in dating. After a recent separation he was out for a good time. He then proceeded to tell me about his drunken night out, which ended with him throwing deck chairs off the back of a party boat. Mmmm, this didn’t really work in his favour so when he made up an excuse to go I was all for it. He told my dad he thought I was lovely and a great catch but he just wasn’t ready for dating. Phew, glad I didn’t have to come up with the reason why I didn’t want to date yet another Neanderthal!
Another matchmaking attempt by a good work friend and her husband was equally unsuccessful. Her husband worked with this guy who was a little older, late 30’s I think. He worked as a labourer as well and by my friend’s description was a very nice, good looking, quiet guy. Well obviously we differ in what we see as good looking! As he approached me, the first thing I noticed is the collared shirt he was wearing looked like it was left over from his year 10 high school formal in the 80’s. Ok, I thought, don’t be so judgmental give him a chance. Then he smiled and had the worst teeth all stained and crooked. Teeth are a big thing to me; there is nothing more off putting than a bad set of fangs. Look he was a nice guy, paid for my dinner bought me drinks, but once he pulled out the Winnie blues (cigarettes), it was definitely all over. I thanked my friends for trying but politely refused any more matchmaking ideas they had.
Don’t get me wrong it’s not all-bad, but I think I prefer to meet a potential date in a group situation. At least then if I’m not interested I don’t have to come up with an excuse not to see them again. Dating was never meant to be easy……
Posted in Dating on August 6th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 1 Comments
Dating.com
Single White Female seeking SINGLE Man.
Looking for an honest, loyal and charming man.
Age: 26-40, although this does change regularly.
Height: I guess not shorter than me, preferably his face doesn’t rest in my cleavage. (I have experienced this it’s almost like having a dog).
Hair: Black, Brown, Blonde, Red, Bald, and Other. Not really an issue except if there is a comb over involved. I guess this comes under other, not sure what else does! I did also go through a stage of only messaging red heads.
Weight: I love this one, Slim, Athletic, Average, A bit overweight. Now who is seriously going to tick the latter? Clearly form some profile photo’s a man’s idea of “athletic” differs from mine. No a six-pack is not talking about beer.
Location: 10-20 kms from my postcode. This too changed and stretched out to just about anywhere!
I’ve just taken my profile off a dating site after 3 years of on and off cyber searching for my ideal partner. Basically I’m over it. It starts as fun your open to anything or anyone but it soon changes as you experience different types of dates and people. If I got one more “Thanks for your kiss but I’ve recently responded to someone else and won’t be following up your contact” I think I’ll scream. How about a “No thanks not interested”, though most of the guys didn’t even respond at all. Ok it’s not all bad; I have a friend who met a guy online her first date and they are now happily married. You could say she got lucky; it’s not always that easy. After receiving and sending over 400 kisses (this is what you send to show your interest) and at least 15 dates you’d think I’d find at least one match, or a guy worth pursuing. Well let me tell you about a few, this could take a couple of pages so I’ll narrow it down to the most memorable ones.
1. The fireman – interesting, the thought of a man in uniform attracted me. When he offered to buy me a drink, I thought this is going ok so far. Then he asked if I wanted my Chardonnay in a schooner glass! Bom Bom (you know that noise on game shows when you get the answer wrong)
2. Sleazy Guy No 1 – We met for a coffee and cake, within 5 minutes he was telling me about the $80,000 boat he was going to buy and how much he liked to spoil his girlfriends and buy them things. Giving him a chance to redeem himself we then went to the pub for a drink, where his hand found my leg within about 10 minutes. I mean it wasn’t even lunchtime! Bom Bom
3. Scottish Guy – met him at a sports bar, my first mistake. I had seen a picture so when I spotted him I approached and asked him if he was my date. He replied no he wasn’t and walked away before I could introduce myself. His accent had given him away and the fact that I knew what he looked like. What a bastard, he obviously didn’t like what he saw, but how rude. Bom Bom
I could go on and on… Don’t get me wrong some of my dates were very nice guys but there was just no immediate connection. Others I spoke to on the phone for weeks building up a rapport only to be disappointed when you met in real life. It’s like you have this great phone relationship but no chemistry in person. One of the reasons I would never move overseas to be with or marry a guy I met online if I had not seen him in person. It works for some but no thanks.
Men’s profiles are always interesting. Nearly every man (and I mean every) has “the Shawshank Redemption”, listed as a favorite movie. I agree it’s good but have some originality. And I love that they list every sport available as a favorite, for me this is such a turn off. A bit of sport is healthy but I don’t want to spend my life watching sport. Photos are interesting, of course you want to be looking your best, but I‘ve turned up to a few dates and the person looked nothing like their photo. It was obviously taken 3 years previously when they had hair and no potbelly (not that this is bad). It is human nature, physical attraction is important. I love the profiles that say, “no bunny boilers need apply”, like your going to admit you some bunny boiling psycho ala Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction! Really it’s a lot of effort just to get a date.
So with my Cyber searching for a partner over for now, where do I go next? Speed dating? Blind Dates? Or maybe stop trying so hard, as they say it’s when you’re not looking…
Posted in Dating on June 17th, 2008 by Blog Admin | | 1 Comments
