The Big V

Lets talk about the V word, no not vagina but virginity. Yes think back some of you readers, to long ago when you were deflowered, became a woman, and all the other bad terms for losing your virginity. Yes Madonna sang about it and shocked the world, ”Like a virgin, touched for the very first time”. For many there’s a story about it both good and bad. But for most it is an event you never forget.

The reason I started thinking about it was the recent controversy in Britain, surrounding a 12 year old boy, who at the time was thought to have fathered a baby with a 15 year old girl. Oh my god how the times are changing, or am I just a prude. But at 12 I was still secretly playing with Barbie and with the help of Ken pretending I knew what sex was. Even at 15, I was still quiet shy with the opposite sex and certainly hadn’t gone past first base! What is too young? I myself think it is better to wait until you have met someone special, and are comfortable with your body and totally in control of your decisions.

I have a friend whose daughter is 14, and I have heard many stories about her friends, which make me cringe and worry. If I had a daughter she’d be locked up until adulthood, that being at least 18! When did girls start to lose their virginity at 12 and 13? Surely that’s not typical in my era. According to a 2007 survey done by Durex, “People worldwide are having sex for the first time at an average age of 17.3. Just over a third (35%) say they were 16 or under when they lost their virginity. Young people continue to have sex at an earlier age than previous generations: while the 25-34s lost their virginity at 17.9, the 21-24 year olds were 17.5 and 16-20 year olds were just 16.3. Women are sexually active earlier than men – at 17.2 compared with 17.5″. Ok so the younger generations are definitely starting earlier, what surprised me is that women are generally younger than men when having sex for the first time. But I think men talk it up more and maybe fib a little to look cool around their mates. Don’t blame them really.

I decided to survey my own group of loyal, ever sharing friends to see how they compared. Most of us are in the 25-34 year old category. The majority of women had sex for the first time around the age of 17. And the men, surprisingly older between 17-19. One friend was 13, but felt it didn’t count because he wasn’t with someone he loved, but coerced by a friend’s older sister. I hear all you men saying, “ I wish”, but really is 13 old enough to deal with the responsibility and emotional stress of first time sex? I mean, at that age the word vagina and penis still makes you fall over in hysterics.

I was 19 and in a relationship with my first serious boyfriend. I remember it being a huge thing and making him wait 4 months. Ok I didn’t get to wear white at my Wedding, but I certainly waited till I was mentally ready. For a woman it’s not necessarily a comfortable or pleasurable thing. Your nervous, scared, often under the influence of alcohol (ok I admit I was), and it can be quiet embarrassing. We have all heard and told the stories about the fumbling, not quiet knowing were the right hole is. This doesn’t really change with age either! But it is a sacred thing to a lot of people, and you don’t just want to give it away. Having said that, recently a 22 year old woman put her virginity up for sale on Ebay and received bids of up to 3.7 million dollars. Firstly who are the perverts who bid! And secondly, why? To pay for her studies of course. What happened to having morals? Maybe I am a prude but some things are meant to be sacred and your virginity is one of them.

Posted in Media, Sex and naughty stuff on July 10th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments