The Buzz Word

Some dialogue from one of my favorite shows, “Sex and the City”.

Miranda: Ladies, I’d like you to meet “The Rabbit.”

Carrie: 92 dollars?!

Miranda: Think about the money we spend on shoes.

Charlotte: Well I have no intention of using that. I’m saving sex for someone I love.

Miranda: Fantastic. Is there a man in the picture?

(Carrie takes it out of the box)

Charlotte: Look! Oh, it’s so cute! Oh I thought it would be all scary and weird, but it isn’t! It’s pink, for girls! I love the little bunny, it has a little face! Like Peter Rabbit.

Carrie: And it’s even got a remote. I mean, how lazy do you have to be?

I woke up at 5.30am this morning with the idea for this blog. Don’t ask me why I had vibrators on the mind, but it gave me inspiration.The above episode from Sex and the City introduced the Rabbit vibrator to many females around the world, here in Oz it retailed for around $250!  Charlotte became a recluse after using it, so apparently the cost was worth it. I remember buying my first vibrator in Canberra, the home of our politicians and a suburb Fishwick known for it’s fireworks and sex related stores. I went in with my girlfriends and our partners, I think the boys were very uncomfortable but of course us girls giggled our way through the store. My best friend and I decided on matching glow in the dark vibrators, that supposably resembled the real thing. That night we left them out (for a laugh) displayed on the bedside table. I will never forget waking up in the night to a glowing luminous penis, it was quiet dirturbing. My boyfriend was disgusted that I bought it, after all I had him, but every woman needs to own her own toy you never know when you might need it.

That one got thrown out when I was moving one day and my mum was helping me pack my room. When I saw it in the naughty draw I quickly threw it out so she wouldn’t see (mums don’t have those sort of things). So thats when i got my own Rabbit, actually it was the cheaper version called “the Penguin”. My girlfriend and I were shopping and saw that Sexpo (health, sex, lifestyle exhibition) was on. I refused to pay the $25 entry fee on the basis that we could go to a sex shop for free to get what we needed. Ok, I sound like a tight arse but these things aren’t cheap you know. Anyway, so off to “Fantasy Lane” in Production Ave we go (yes thats really the name of the street) for a shopping expedition. These places are a real eye opener, there are things I have never seen before and never want to see again! At one stage I was standing baffled looking at a section of the store, when my girlfriend yelled out, “do you realise you’re in the butt section”. Needless to say I ran away very quickly giggling all the way. Again we ended up buying matching purple penguin vibrators (I know the matching thing sounds weird but they were 2 for one). Not glow in the dark, no remote, but with lots of functions, ball bearing looking things and a rotating penis, what more could you ask for. And, half the price of the rabbit, nothing like a bargain.

The last laugh goes to the Sex and the City girls again.

Miranda: You haven’t met the Rabbit

Samantha: Oh, come on. if your going to get a vibrator, at least at least get one called the Horse.

Posted in Sex and naughty stuff on April 17th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments

Positions 101 – Part one

After reading an article on sexual positions I decided to do some of my own research and share it with you. What fun I had, and boy did I laugh. Ever put sexual positions in your search engine? The results were interesting and quite amusing. There are so many I thought I had better split them up into a few posts. Most are traditional or Kama Sutra positions.

This is a Kama Sutra position called the second posture of the perfumed garden, there are 21 different positions in the perfumed garden (sounds delightful doesn’t it)  mainly all designed for men’s pleasure by a man of course. It is also a variation of the Missionary called bee’s knees, apparently suitable for a man with a shorter member. What a nice way of putting it. I think this is for the more athletically inclined, the man does have to do a lot of the work (I like it already) but you try having your knees pushed up into your chest or up around you ears, it doesn’t leave a lot of breathing space. Especially if your big busted and everything gets pushed up around your neck with your knees. It does allow for intimate lovemaking, as my book “Real sex for real women” by Laura Berman says, “It allows you to watch each others orgasm face”. Does that make it sound pornographic to anyone else?

Girl on top or Cowgirl position for obvious reasons. Now whose in control! Definately one of my favorites. After all I am a Virgo and need to be in control. This is not for the self-conscious, because your body is on full display but you get to control the moves. I do sometimes wonder whilst in this position if my boobs are wobbling too much but as many men have assured me this is not a turn off anyway. There is also the reverse cowgirl position where the woman is on top but facing backwards. I’d be a little worried if your partner favoured this position, I’d be asking myself why doesn’t he want to see your face is he fantasising about someone else? And does my butt look big from behind? Not a fan of this reverse angle.

Standing whilst leaning up against a wall or the Kama Sutra name “driving the peg home”, (Once you have read the Kama Sutra you realise many of the names make no sense at all). Great, when you want a quickie and don’t have time or space to undress. Good for the shower, can be reversed to lean against the wall. It can’t be as hard as it looks, I’ve seen it done in movies all the time. If your man can lift you, great, otherwise keep at least a foot on the ground the man is very vulnerable in this position, this could lead to some serious injury to his appendage if you slip!

I have only just begun, there is so much more to share with you. Positions like the deckchair, leap frog, camel ride and many more. Have I got you interested? Well stay tuned for my next instalment. I might just put a few of these into practise, at least gives me something to write about!

Posted in Sex and naughty stuff on April 6th, 2009 by Blog Admin | | 1 Comments