School Holiday Fun
I write for an online magazine Connect2mums and here is my latest article, a little different to my usual.
Aren’t school holidays fun. Firstly you have to think of something to entertain the kid’s everyday, which usually sends you broke. Then put up with standing in extra long queue’s to get into any child friendly activity or place. Most parents are counting down the days till school goes back. Ok, I’m not a parent yet so what does this all have to do with me? I’m a fulltime Nanny, my job is looking after 3 children, 5 days a week. Yes I may get paid to do this but I also put up with all the same things parents do. And, I find school holidays hectic, chaotic and very exhausting.
So far in my first week of holidays I have experienced a few occasions which warrant writing about. Ill start with the times I wished it was time to go back to school. We decided to take a trip on the train with my sister and her kids to a Disney on Ice show, oh what fun. Miss four year old was very excited as I think she had only experienced the train a few times. We were enjoying the scenery when my nephew sneezed. What is so bad about that you ask? Well Miss four year old has a very weak stomach, and on seeing a tiny bit of snot coming out of his nose started heaving. Having dealt with this before I was ready, by the time she started vomiting I was in front of her catching it in my hands, to the amusement and disgust of all the other passengers. Well what did they want me to do, let her vomit all over the floor and seat? I calmly put the vomit in a plastic bag, cleaned her up with wipes and we were on our way. At least the show we went to see was tolerable!
Sometimes while I’m working hard, on my way to fun indoor playlands full of sugar fuelled screaming kids, I fit in a bit of shopping. Miss 4 year old does encourage me, she is always picking things out for me to try on and I can’t say no. On this particular day the sales were on (how cunning to time with school holidays). I had a few pairs of jeans to try on so we crowded into a change room with pram and all (nearly 2 year old with us too). As I’ve stripped down to my under wear Miss 4 year old says in her loudest voice, “Mel, your legs are so fat and wobbly”. I thanked her for pointing that out and asked her to keep her voice down, but inside I was cringing. But she wasn’t finished, “when you move they wobble”, followed by fits of giggles, and of course the younger one joins in, finding laughing catching. At this point I was over the jeans and whilst dressing, tried to explain how it’s not nice to say things to someone that may hurt their feelings, but knowing she was just being honest as children are. I don’t know how many times I’ve been asked why my boobies are big or why there is a red mark on my face (that damn pimple, only a child could point it out). Oh well, at least something positive came of it. I jumped back on the treadmill!
One of my favourite times this week was when Miss 4 year old decided to throw a tantrum. And I’m not talking about your garden variety tantrum. No it was the tantrum that would win an Oscar, an award winning performance, and I can’t even remember what started it. Usually not much when you’re 4. Anyway at first it was crying and saying no, then she was screaming like a banshee. I was expecting her head to start spinning and vomit to start flying out of her mouth. In the end she was hysterical and got sent to her room to calm down. She fell asleep, obviously tantrum throwing is exhausting stuff, and woke up like nothing had even happened. It’s not the first and certainly won’t be the last. Especially since now Mr 2 year old has hit the prime tantrum throwing age as well.
I’m sure there are more stories to come, one week down, one to go. Don’t get me wrong, there are also lots of enjoyable occasions, but of course the memorable ones are remembered for a reason.
Posted in Family and Relationships, Life on July 18th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Winter Wonders
Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. ~Edith Sitwell
I don’t like winter! I don’t like being cold or wet, it makes me wish I was a bear so I can hibernate all winter long. Although not eating for that long may just kill me. My partner has similar views so we make a great (but grumpy pair). Now winter has started and has quite a while to go, I needed to remind myself of all the good things to keep me going. And get me out of bed in the morning! So here’s a list of my 5 favourite winter pastimes to do at home.
1. Snuggling together with your partner under a great big soft doona and even better if you have an electric blanket. Although my boyfriend wasn’t impressed with my flannelette winter pyjamas. I’m not sure why, I thought love hearts and teddy bears were kind of cute.
2. Keeping it in the bedroom, I must admit sex is so much better during the colder months. Not having to make love on a hot day where you end up suctioned together with sweat. It’s so much nicer to feel soft skin, although I don’t think my b/f appreciates my hairy unshaven legs.
3. Hot bubble baths, especially when my b/f runs it for me when I get home from work (even better when given a glass of wine, hint, hint). Long hot showers, even better when it’s a shower for two and you don’t end up passing out from the extra heat.
4. Slow cookers. The best thing I ever purchased. What I love is that it is so easy to use. I can leave everything out in the morning get my b/f to throw it all in and cook for me. Dinner cooked to go with that bubble bath. I sound spoilt, don’t I?
5. Watching romantic movies curled up on the lounge with a big bowl of popcorn. I’m working on the romantic movie bit, but I am just happy to be inside with my favourite blanket keeping me warm.
Ok, that wasn’t as hard as I thought, but I did only keep it to things to do at home. I’m off to have my bubble bath, then heading to my warm bed to read my book. And who knows what else….
Posted in Life, Love and Relationships on June 10th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Why Won’t Men go to the Doctor???
“I came in to make an appointment with the dentist.” said the man to the receptionist. “I’m sorry sir.” she replied. “He’s out right now, but…” “Thank you,” interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. “When will he be out again?”
Why is it men refuse to go to the Doctor, dentist or whatever specialist necessary, when they are sick, until the last minute, if at all? I have been asking (ok maybe nagging) my boyfriend to go to the dentist to have his teeth checked. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable as part of his tooth noticeably broke off. Call me superficial but I really don’t want to be dating Cletus the slack-jawed-yokel (a favourite Simpson’s character). He tells me there is more work needed but I just can’t see it. So why won’t he go to the Dentist? His excuse is the money. Knowing there is a lot to be done he keeps putting it off saying it will cost a fortune. I say it’s worth it. At least have a check up and assess the damage then go from there. I think there may be a bit of fear as well (not that a man would admit it). Being scared or the fearing the consequences of an illness or problem are major reasons men avoid visiting health practitioners.
I’m at the Doctors for regular check ups and when I get really sick. I visit the Dentist twice a year (much to my dismay, I hate the Dentist he’s so mean), and I get my skin checked every year. But women are in more of a habit when it comes to check ups, as we have to do annual pap smears, breast checks, all those fun things men miss out on! An article in the Sydney Morning Herald about”Why men don’t go to the Doctor” says men are less likely to take notice of there health and ask for help. “Research has found that men are much less likely than women to engage in preventative health screens, such as checking for testicular cancer or requesting cholesterol or blood pressure tests. Men’s diets are also poorer than women’s and they’re less likely to use sunscreen or receive vaccines and flu shots.”
Men tend to tough it out with the big stuff then end up in bed for week when they have a sniffle, with you at their beck and call (maybe that’s the plan). The article states other reasons for avoiding Dr Visits include:
- They prefer to “tough it out”, illness = weakness
- They give priority to work over rest, us women have no choice we work whilst sick especially all the mums.
- Stubborn, they don’t want to admit we are right and they do need to lose that belly or that the scab on their hand is a skin cancer, (the latter is for my boyfriend!)
- Embarrassed, after what we women go through (read previous blog on Bartholin cyst) coughing with a Doctor handling your testicles is a cinch.
- Time, lets face it men don’t like waiting. If they can’t arrive and walk straight in then they won’t go.
So it seems it’s not just me nagging my partner. The article also states many appointments are made by the mans partner or mother or they would never go, (that’s funny, I booked him in to the skin specialist next week!). So I’m not turning into his mother merely taking over her role. Well it s a job and someone has to do it!
Posted in Men's Issues on May 27th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Mum’s The Word
Motherhood has always been a great desire of mine. I can’t remember a time I didn’t want to have children. I grew up surrounding myself with children, I chose a career in childcare, and my life wouldn’t be fulfilled if I didn’t have any of my own. I haven’t had any as of yet, mainly due to circumstances within my life. But now that I am in a serious relationship it is something my partner and I have talked about and are hoping to do in the near future. Actually saying it out loud, even putting it to paper suddenly makes it real and scary.
I’ve been in childcare for around 18 years, the last 10 spent nannying for various families. This doesn’t make me an expert on children, but I’d like to think it gives me a head start. After all I have had my current charge since he was born 2 years ago, so he feels like mine only I get to go home at night. I still get to experience the ups and downs of raising children. The erratic sleeping patterns, the sometimes stressful times when the child is ill (I got used to being frequently covered in vomit or poo), tantrums, and the times they make you feel overwhelmed with happiness. Future motherhood has got me asking myself, will I be a good mother? Do I have what it takes to raise a child in today’s world? It made me think about my own values, morals and how I’d like to bring up a child. Of course I realized so much of this I learnt from my own parents, and my upbringing.
One thing I realised is I want to be around to see my children grow up. Whilst we were growing up and still in school I always remember my Mum being home. When I got home from school she was always there and if she worked it was at night and my Dad stayed home. I saw so many of my friends whose mums worked full time and hardly got to spend quality time with them. Looking back now I appreciate it, we may have had to do without the latest gadgets, toys and clothes because we were on a budget, but we always had our Mum. Although I know it’s hard these days to afford a parent to stay home, I hope to spend as much time as possible with my children. If it means missing out on extravagances I don’t care, it’s far more important to see your child grow up than take an overseas trip. I know my parents missed out on a lot of things but they are doing it all now we are grown up.
My mum grew up in a strict household, her father having been a WW2 veteran was a very hard man. Although sometimes she was tough on us I now appreciate it, having grown up a very responsible adult (well most of the time). At work I can see my mum in the way I discipline the children. I am very big on manners, we were always taught to speak when spoken to, even just to say hello. Say please and thank you, little things I know, but people notice a well mannered child. I even make the 2 year old sit at the table whilst his sister is finishing her dinner. We ate as a family every night and you didn’t leave the table till you were all finished. This is time to sit and talk about your day, have a laugh and chill for 15 minutes!
My mum was pregnant and married at 18. Gee I didn’t even have sex till I was 19, so I obviously learnt from her mistakes (ok, I love my brother but he was unexpected)! I think that’s why she was strict, I had curfews, wasn’t always allowed to go to party’s underage etc. But once I turned 18 I had my freedom to do as I pleased. Still I told mum what I was doing, my siblings say I was the golden child, but really I just showed mum the respect she deserved. I wanted to finish school, study and have a good career. Marriage and motherhood were definitely on my agenda for later in life. I hope I can instill some of these values in my children. I want them to feel like they can talk to me, be honest and hopefully I will set a good example for them.
Your relationship with your mum changes over time. I feel like she is my friend as well as my mum. I’m sure when you have children it changes again. I see the love and devotion she gives to her grandchildren and can’t wait to share that with my own. The most important thing my mum taught me is love and support. I went through the trauma of suddenly losing my husband 8 years ago. The first thing I did was go home to where it was familiar, comfortable and secure. My parents supported me financially by giving me a home till I got sorted. But mostly emotionally, they also lost a son in law but never wavered in their love and support for me. I remember waking from a bad dream one night and hopping in bed with mum like when I was little. I just needed the closeness and comfort. How easy that is to give. I think that experience taught me what is important in life and why your relationship with your mum is so important and shapes the person you will end up being.
I could go on and on and on. I hope you are all lucky enough to have a mum like mine. I truly hope I will be a good mother; I have no doubt if I use what I learnt, I will do just fine.
Happy Mothers Day
Posted in Uncategorized on May 9th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Lets Talk About Sex….Again
I saw an article in the The Daily Telegraph which caught my eye. “Sex lives of Australian women”, which led to a book by the same name. It involved the findings of a major online survey regarding sex and women in Australia. Around 2000 women were surveyed, and the results are interesting. Firstly a woman apparently has an average of 13 different sexual partners in her life. Phew, glad I make that category. But really how true is it? We all know what they say, women half it, men double it. But thats our secret. Let me share with you a few other interesting findings.
ONE in four women view pornography regularly; does perving in the locker room during half time of a footy game on T.V count?
MOST women (61 per cent) masturbate at least once a month; mmmm, well have you seen the toys out there these day’s, why wouldn’t you.
ONE in five have starred in their own sex tape; uh uh, not going to happen. Any video that comes near my naked body will end up jammed somewhere painful. Who really wants to watch themselves having sex?? Other than celebrities of course.
MULTIPLE partners are a growing fad; not sure if this means at once, or one after the other. But gee are we turing into men!
MANY complain of boring sex lives and one in three rarely, if ever, experience orgasm; well they need to read my blog more for tips. Or get a new partner who knows what he’s doing.
ALMOST half (49 per cent) say they want sex most of the time when it is offered. I must say, I don’t often knock back sex, but I am in my 30’s which is apparently in my prime. And the humping like rabbits when in a fresh relationship doesn’t last forever, so I say make the most of it.
It also states that women want more emotional intimacy before sex, and need to understand their voice is there most important sexual organ. In otherwords tell him what you want. He won’t know if you don’t tell him! This basically leads to women faking orgasms regularly, (as seen in the above clip, which I love from “When Harry met Sally”). 1 in 10 women do fake it almost everytime, according to another survey reported in the Daily Mail. Which doesn’t say a lot for the male lovers of the world.
So what that tells me is, women out there need to take control, ask for what you want, watch plenty of porn, tape yourself having (drunk) sex, masturbate regularly and you’ll be happy in your relationship. Sounds so easy!
Posted in In the News, Sex and naughty stuff on April 8th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
Holiday Romance
Think of the last romantic holiday you had. For many it would probably be your honeymoon, if you were lucky enough to have one. It makes me think of romantic walks on the beach, cocktails by the pool, passionate lovemaking, candlelit dinners and of course gazing into each others eyes and whispering “I love you” as the sun sets on the horizon. OK, is it making you want to puke yet? Or maybe complain to your husband that he’s never romantic anymore. This mostly happens in the movies, to girls like Julia Roberts and Meg Ryan, with guys like Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise (pre couch jumping days). It’s not all bad though, I recently had my first holiday with my boyfriend of 6 months to Phuket in Thailand, “the land of smiles”. It definitely had its funny, romantic and frustrating moments, which I’m going to share with you. My boyfriend just loves me sharing our private life!
If you really want to get to know someone, go on holidays with them. I noticed any modesty I had went out the window once we had to share a room 24/7. In a new relationship you’re still getting comfortable with each other, exploring boundaries. Well when you have to share a bathroom with a window that looks out into your bedroom, you soon lose any inhibitions you may have had. The not coming in when I’m on the toilet rule goes on the first day. There are usually only two rooms in a hotel room, the bedroom and bathroom. So it’s very likely you will share these many times. It’s so romantic when you’re on the toilet and your boyfriend decides to shave, or you’re in the shower and he has to pee. After a day I stopped shutting the door, my only rule, I needed privacy to do the important business of number 2, there has to be something left sacred.
We had many nice dinners together, after scoffing ourselves at the breakfast buffet (I’m talking at least 5 courses) we usually didn’t eat again till dinner. The food in Thailand is delicious and so cheap, so you could go to dinner go all out and not worry about breaking the budget. Now that’s romance. My boyfriend even ate chicken feet and crickets, Yuk. (Fried Crickets taste like chicken apparently); all it did was make me not want to kiss him till he got the grasshopper legs out of his teeth. One night we did have a romantic dinner by candle light at our favourite restaurant, well it was romantic till a local man asked me when my baby was due. OK, I had eaten 2 entrees, Thai red curry, satay chicken and stir fry noodles, so my belly was a little bloated. Of course then I whined the whole way home that I needed to go on a diet and he could never ever see me naked again etc etc. He said all the right things and I soon got over it, to go out and eat more the next night.
We did get to experience the sun setting over the water; you forget how beautiful it is. We got a great spot on the beach right in front of the sun on the horizon. It was very romantic once we accepted the European tourists in front of us, doing Vogue glamour shots with their cameraman director, would not be moving out of the way. So every photo we got has some glamour girl doing an “oh what a feeling” jump in the background. Secretly I think my boyfriend enjoyed this spectacle. We did get a photo of the two of us with the sunset background. Everyone went awwww when they saw it, so it must have been romantic.
One of the funniest moments was when we had been on a night out drinking in Patong. When we arrived back to the hotel, we decided to have a nice sensual bath with champagne and pork crackle chips (these were great, we even brought some home). We needed to cleanse after seeing a ping pong show involving ladies pulling things out of their lady areas. I’m talking a frog, budgie (yes they were alive), eel, and 10 meters of wool among other things. I could really write a whole other blog about this, but let’s not go there! Anyway, what we didn’t realize in our drunken state was that Thai baths although long, are very narrow and two people unless tiny were not going to fit in it together. If you walked in all you would have seen was 4 legs sticking out in all directions, and me laughing so hard it hurt. To make matters worse I dropped the chips in the bath! It didn’t end up romantic, but definitely a very memorable moment.
Our holiday, with all it’s funny moments and spontaneous adventures was actually very romantic, because it was spent with someone I care about. Even being squashed in economy on a budget airline for a 9 hour trip home, didn’t take a way from what a wonderful experience travelling is with someone else. Everyone always tells you holidaying with your partner is a good test of how strong your relationship is. It can be tiring, sometimes frustrating but when you get home and still want to spend time together, I’d say it was a good sign of things to come. Next holiday? Trekking in Nepal, nah I think Ill stick to romance by the beach.
Posted in Love and Relationships on February 28th, 2010 by Blog Admin | | 0 Comments
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